Episode 5
EP 5 - Cycles
In this week's episode, I get real about cycles—what they are, how they show up, and how damn hard they can be sometimes.
This isn’t just a dictionary definition kind of episode. I share my personal experiences with ancestral cycles, family patterns, and the tough realities of breaking habits that were ingrained from a young age.
From growing up in a home where "I love you" wasn’t said, to healing the mother wound, to learning how to set boundaries without guilt, this episode is a raw look at the behind-the-scenes work that’s often messy, painful, and anything but perfect.
Cycles aren’t just something happening "out there"—they live inside of us too. And healing them requires real courage, awareness, and compassion for yourself.
If this resonates with you and you're feeling called to dive deeper into your own cycles and healing journey, I invite you to book a 1:1 session with me✨.
You don’t have to do this alone—and sometimes having support can make all the difference.
✨Website: www.sparktheheartz.com
✨Booking Link: https://lissie.setmore.com
💬 Let's Connect on Social Media!
I’d love to hear how this episode resonated with you. Tag me or send me a DM!
✨💜Social Media💜✨
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Transcript
Hi and welcome to the Spark the Hearts podcast. My name is Lizzie and I'm an
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:intuitive energy channel and a rakey practitioner. This podcast is a safe space
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:where we talk about spirituality, energetics, cycles, rebirth and so much more. So
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:while I'm in your field of awareness today, I hope you tune into the frequency of
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:this episode with an open heart and a new sense of curiosity. As a reminder,
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:you're a sovereign being, so take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Let's
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:get started. Hi and welcome back to this week's episode. I hope that you've
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:been having a good couple of weeks in between from the last one. And if you're
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:binge-watching, not binge-watching, but binge-listening to my podcast. Welcome. I'm so
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:honored to have you here and I'm just so grateful and thankful. If you're on a
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:platform that allows you to leave a comment to let me know how you guys are
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:doing today, please, I invite you to do so. I'd love to hear where you're tuning in
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:from. What's going on in your part of the world and how life be life in for you.
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:Now, I wanted to make this podcast episode about what are cycles and I started to
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:really like, I had recorded this episode like two to three times already. And even
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:today, as I'm going to sit down and edit it, I realize like, you guys are here to
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:hear me explain my perspective on things and also get real about stuff. And I
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:felt like I was just giving you guys the textbook definition of what a cycle is,
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:what it can feel like and look like, and you know, I call in support from
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:Archangel to give these examples. But I realize now I also have to talk about my
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:experiences. And I had this pull-in tug about how raw do I want to get with my
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:experiences and how much I want to share because for me, cycles have not been an
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:easy thing. It really happened. And they hit very different levels in my life,
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:depending on if it was a cycle that is ancestral, if it is a cycle within my
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:immediate family, if it is a cycle that I'm having internally with myself or
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:romantic partner or friendships or whether it's career, cycles expand within us
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:and outside of us. And it's not just one thing. It can be so many. So I feel like
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:I'm gonna start off this podcast episode, like just being honest. I'm out here in
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:my backyard. I'm about to edit this podcast and I thought, you know what? I've had
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:this feeling of like this episode needs more. It is my sasson, my flavor, my personal
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:experience with it because I shit you not. It has not been easy. Even sitting here
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:and being in my backyard and you guys can obviously hear this noises. So I do
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:apologize, but I felt like I just wanted to show the messy side of it as well
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:because it's not always perfect. You're not going to get everything in one try.
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:You're not always going to figure out everything immediately. And I feel like I
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:got to bring that honesty, that rawness, that authenticity to this podcast
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:because at the end of the day, this was not easy for me. And I only share this so
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:that you don't feel like, oh my god, it's so easy for everybody to figure out this
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:awareness, so easy to figure out the spirituality aspect of stuff. So easy to
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:set boundaries. It was not easy for me. It took either being physically in pain,
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:emotionally in pain, mentally stressed out or burnout to get me to be the
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:person I am today. Me three years ago, me five years ago, me 10 years ago, 20 years
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:ago is not the same person. I honestly was debating like, how much do I want to
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:share with my listeners? Because I don't know how else to be of service if I'm not
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:honest with you guys. And so for me, I just wanted to share a few of my personal
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:experiences with cycles. They have never been freaking easy. They got easier
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:with time. But some of the hardest cycles I had to undergo were themes that were
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:with my family ancestral. And I feel like it's nice to call out these frequencies
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:and this energy. And I feel like lately this year has been like really calling
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:me to just speak up and talk about family dynamics that aren't the easiest
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:because I don't come from a perfect family. I don't think anybody really does,
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:even though we might, you know, have some good things, but nobody's really perfect.
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:And I mean, my ancestral background is very diverse is what I'm starting to
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:learn this year through just DNA itself. But at the same time, it's like, I didn't
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:really understand how different my family was until I started interacting with
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:other families. And what I mean by that is specifically when I got with my husband
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:who was in my boyfriend, I really started to realize parts of my family that
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:weren't quote on quote normal. I come from a family that didn't really express
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:the word I love you. Though I'm a very affectionate person to my husband, my
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:friends, and now I'm learning to expand that out with my family, my immediate
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:family, I didn't grow up in a household where we hugged. I didn't grow up in a
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:household where we said I loved you or express our feelings. It was more of, you
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:know, the typical. We make fun of each other to show affection, you know, if one of
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:us is really hurting, then we can show a little bit of like vulnerability, but I
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:was raised in a household where it was seen as a weakness to have so much
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:feeling, where we didn't really talk about the problems. We put them under the
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:rug and we hit them even though we were all not okay inside. And it gets really hard
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:to talk about this stuff because it's not easy. And I'm actively working on
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:healing this aspect by expressing my emotions and speaking with the truth that
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:comes from the heart and setting boundaries in the ways that I need to protect
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:myself. And when I say protect myself, it's not overexerting myself like I used
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:to do because a part of that cycle, ancestrally, is, and I don't know if you guys
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:have this too, but my family's background is next again. So it's very much about
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:family showing up doing things, but it wasn't always in service of oneself. It's
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:always like you got to show up like, I'm your mom, I got to do everything for my
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:mom, you got to show it for the family, you got to make sure. Like I would see my
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:mom have these cycles with her mom, even though her mom was not the best mom. And to
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:be fair, she wasn't the best grandma. And so as you guys can kind of get a vibe
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:for on my previous podcast episode. And I'm calling this out because it's not to
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:talk smack on my family, but it's also to show like how family dynamics went
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:unhealthy and they are allowed to continue on can really affect people in more
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:ways than one. For me personally, it's seeing my mom as a young kid like making
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:sure that she sends money to Mexico because her mom needs it for whatever
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:thing. Like making sure that the family is okay, but her mom never provided
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:emotional support. Never made her feel in a sense loved or supported, but she
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:still had that sense of obligation and duty for the family. That was like very
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:much there. So if you have like that type of dynamic in your background, pay
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:attention to your parents and see how it plays out and see how maybe that was
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:in a sense imprinted on to you because I know it was to me. Like for the longest
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:time, I would do things out of the sense of obligation for my mother. And it is
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:until I started to kind of really back up and stop trying to be someone who was
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:just doing things because in a sense, you can be showing up and providing
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:monetarily and being of support because you think, okay, I got to be there. I got to
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:be there because my mom didn't have that with her mom. But in reality, you also
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:have to see the other side of it was I being provided with the same type of
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:energy. Because at one point, I could see my mom. She loves me. She cares for me. But
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:there are things within our relationship that wasn't the best. And this goes
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:hand in hand with cycles because I started to see that there was the same cycle of
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:me providing to someone who wasn't providing for me. And that's that. That if you
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:want to call it the mother wound. And I felt I'm supported in the ways that I
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:needed for me. Yet I always showed up. And I said, I need to stop this. Because even
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:though she is my mother and I love her dearly, I can't continue the same cycle. She
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:allowed to continue in her life whether she was conscious of it or not. I am. So
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:that's one uncomfortable cycle that I'm currently working on myself with with
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:[Motor]
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:the support of my therapist. And speaking up, saying what I can and can't do, and
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:not providing in the same ways, especially when I do not feel supported in the
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:same manner. And why I bring this up is because I know everybody is healing at
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:different aspects. But I truly feel like if you're listening to this podcast and
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:you are attuned to my frequency and my voice, there's something on this
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:episode that is meant to hit your your awareness. So that's like one family
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:dynamic cycle that's there that I can easily call out now. And it took me 30
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:something years to be fully aware of it. Because my conscious is needed to grow.
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:My experiences outside of my family needed to show me things. And cycles are
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:immensely multi-dimensional, super intricate and magical at the same time
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:because there are cycles that are playing out within your being to build that
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:confidence, to build that awareness, to build that choice point within yourself.
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:And I love my mentor Amy because she taught me about choice points when I was
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:having one on ones with her and I will forever be grateful. So if you are tuning in
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:Amy at any point, I just want to say shout out girl, thank you. I appreciate you
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:giving me that understanding because we all have choice points within ourselves.
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:Whether we allow something to continue or not. And I feel like at that point of
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:me understanding that I was overextending and giving more than what I was
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:receiving, there was an imbalance. And in order to create that balance within
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:myself, I needed to really look at the situation and see it. And at first it
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:started with me not being able to provide in the same way, me not feeling like I
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:was being provided for. But then when I had the moment to integrate and really look
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:at things and see further out, I could see this pattern has been something that's
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:been going on generations. My mother did it to her mother. My grandmother did the
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:same to her mother. And who knows for how long it's been going on, or the sense
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:of not being enough, but still showing up out of obligation and duty. So if this
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:is you, no, you're not alone. Now that's an ancestral cycle that I've been working
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:on. And another one that I would say is personal would be one with my cycle of
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:food, my health. That is a totally different one that has spiraled out and expand
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:out in so many different ways. I could say honestly, as a child, I grew up in a
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:home where food was not monitored. So it wasn't like I was super overweight, but
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:like I can indulge in snacks. I could really honestly say that back then we
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:would not drink water. It would be like juices, milk, sodas, caprisons, like I was
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:not hydrating. It wasn't the same way as it is now where everybody's like you need
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:to hydrate, make sure you drink your water, not everybody was carrying around the
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:water bottles to stay hydrated. I remember being at the park and freaking having
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:caprisons. Like that was the thing. If you were running around and sweating, if we
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:were outside playing, I'd come into the house and there'd be like a soda and I'd be
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:like, okay, cool. I'm going to drink this. It's going to cool me down and whatever.
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:But it's not like there was somebody around who was really teaching nutrition
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:to me in that sense. So you can only imagine like the things not only
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:on how would I say this. I'm trying to describe something that I see in my mind,
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:but I'm having a hard time to connect with my words. But you could see the patterns
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:that have been playing out within my family about nutrition
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:because my mom had always struggled with her weight. And I remember she would buy all this stuff
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:in the house, but there was no sense of control as far as like how much we were eating.
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:Yeah, she'd be like, you can only have one of these, but she would choose a single mom.
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:She wouldn't be home. She couldn't really monitor us. So we'd get home from school
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:and we'd literally indulge. We didn't always have the best habits of like how to cook things.
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:Like I would be cooking and I'd be using hegg oil to make pancakes or I would be doing
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:things that because that's how I grew up. That's what taste did good to me.
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:And so as I started to get older and especially when I moved out of the house,
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:I started to see that my cooking style changed. I didn't really have milk in the house
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:or my apartment then. I wasn't cooking with a bunch of oil. I was still like
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:salting my food like crazy, but then at one point I started to realize I didn't like the way
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:my body was looking. And so I decided and I had a choice that in order for me to feel better,
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:I needed to actively do something. So at that point I decided I'm going to go ahead and run
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:around the apartment complex and lose some weight. And so I did that and then I started to realize,
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:okay, aside from losing weight and you know doing the exercises like what kind of foods can I
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:integrate. And that's when it really started to switch up. And I noticed through my relationship
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:with my then boyfriend, now husband, he kind of would make a comment of, why do you throw salt
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:on your food before you taste it? And I was just like what? He goes, I noticed that you do this
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:thing where you make dinner and you taste it while you're cooking. But then when you sit down at the
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:table, you throw salt. And I was just like, oh, it's just habit. And he was like, okay, but I remember
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:being a kid and my mom would like take us out to go get tacos. And it would be a thing to just like
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:open up the salt packet, put the salt on top of the tacos and like the lemon and just eat it like
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:super salty because that's what I enjoyed. But I didn't realize that this is a habit I picked up
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:because of family dynamics like these things, these patterns. And my mom would eat in certain way
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:and I picked up on that habit too. And so I was just like, oh, I didn't notice. And then he would just
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:kind of just made a comment, but he brought awareness to my action. I thought, hmm, this is interesting.
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:And so then, you know, he also noticed because he grew up in a completely different household than mine.
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:And he was just like, use a lot of oil in your food. I was like, oh, I didn't realize that. He goes,
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:you know, you could still do this. So he taught me new ways of cooking. And I thought it was really
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:interesting because nobody ever took the time to say something like that to me. Not saying that
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:it came from a place of like, oh, you need to stop that. But more of like just curiosity. And he had
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:me reflect. And I thought, I really appreciate that because I didn't know any other way. Like,
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:I grew up doing that. Nobody ever said that it was wrong. Nobody ever really questioned it. It's
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:not like I went over to my friend's houses and cooked over there. We'd hang out, talk, and stuff. But I'd
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:never, nobody was around to see the way that I would cook until I got with my husband and boyfriend.
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:So I thought I found it really fascinating that he would just save a few things. Then my relationship
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:started to switch up with the way I would cook. And that would also kind of trickle out into my family
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:dynamics. And here's how. So I was on the cycle of breaking old habits of how I would eat, right?
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:I wouldn't incorporate the same stuff because now I had this nuisance of awareness like, okay,
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:you don't need that much oil to make this food. You don't need to salt in your food. And maybe you
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:need to be aware of what you're inputting into your body because some of the ingredients in these
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:things like red dyes. When I found that out, I was like, oh my god, no, I don't want to eat anything with
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:red dye in it. And it was this whole thing. And it's found in a lot of things. You'd be surprised.
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:And like being aware of like how much sugar and this and stuff. And then I started to really
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:get into this health kit. And I said, okay, I'm not going to do this. So when it came time to like
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:go visit my mom and have some food or something, I'd be like, hey, can you like not put so much oil in
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:it or this? And then she kind of got offended. Not kind of she did. Because I remember she'd be like,
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:what do you mean? I go, well, I don't really eat like that. You know, can you want it? She just took
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:it as like, what is going on with you? I didn't mean it in a way of being disrespectful, but I can see
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:now it's like telling somebody, hey, can you not make it like that even though you made it your whole
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:life this way? And so that turned into me realizing, oh, I'm really shaking up patterns that have
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:been within my family for a really long time. And just because I'm ready to break off those cycles
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:of unconscious eating or unconscious cooking and being more intentional and conscious with what I'm
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:making to put it into my body doesn't mean everybody outside me was. And that in a sense cause friction.
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:And even to this day, it's something that still comes up because at this point now, I'm a vegetarian.
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:So I don't eat meat. There's been times where like during the holidays, my mom will make the malice.
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:And it's like, you think she'd kind of understand by now that I don't eat meat, but I'm cold with
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:cheeses and I'm cold with this. And even like the making of the busole, I would ask, like, can we not put,
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:you know, you make like some which is the bone broth and all this. And it's like, she looks at me like,
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:I'm crazy sometimes, which is funny to me now while I'm talking about this, but it kind of hurts.
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:You know, not kind of it does because it's somebody who's showing me that they're not willing to change or
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:budge for me. And for the longest time, I would just be like, oh, it's okay. But then I had to also learn,
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:no, I need to be firm in my decisions. And also then if you're not going to budge in the way that you
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:make food, then I don't have to partake in the consuming, consuming the food that is in for me.
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:And whether or not emotions get hurt. And that's another thing in just being able to talk it out.
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:And then also understanding that even if I try to explain, if the person is not receptive on the
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:other end of what I am doing, it is not my job to always make them understand. It's just by basically
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:stating this, and sometimes that creates uncomfortableness. So this is why I say, cycles haven't been
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:easy for me because I've had to do them with really close people in my life and intimate family
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:relationships, friendships, as well as romantic. And it's taking me a sense of awareness and willingness
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:to get vulnerable and willingness to build boundaries and ways that I was never taught to do before.
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:And it goes against everything that I grew up with and shedding what is it mine so that I could have
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:those conversations so that I could stand on my own. And sometimes that's really uncomfortable.
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:So I wanted to put this piece in here because again, you guys could easily google what a cycle is.
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:But if I don't share what it felt like for me and how it can unfold in real life,
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:it could take years to go through cycles. It's not something where, oh, it's just a cycle. It's a
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:season like, no, it took me being 20 something to start to really get me awareness of what was the
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:food I was putting in my mouth. And then another 10 years to really switch it out to, okay, now I want
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:to be a vegetarian. And my reasoning was, it was getting too hard to chew on meat. It was getting
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:too hard to chew on certain foods and it wasn't tasting the same in my mouth. And that's my personal
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:thing. I wanted to do it for me. It was not making my body feel like this. I still have chicken broth,
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:I still have beef broth. Like don't get me wrong, but I just don't need the meat. And so everybody has
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:their own personal reasons for doing things. These are mine. But I realize and I really want to put
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:an emphasis on that though we want to push through things fast, though we want to have results
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:instantly, it takes time for certain things and lessons to unfold because I had that uncomfortable
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:nest with my family and realizing like, oh, we don't hug. Now I can hug my siblings and express
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:that I love them and I care for them and say sorry and be more vulnerable because I understand now
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:that there wasn't that level of emotional intelligence in my household to be able to express emotions
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:because that was not taught either. And me choosing to be vulnerable, to be expressive, to do the
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:hard thing that was against my programming and throughout the cycles of having uncomfortableness
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:come up. Then I realize, okay, this is what cycles look like and this is what healing looks like.
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:And so I'm saying all this so that you can understand that it could take years to really go through
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:something and have that level of awareness within yourself. And I really wanted to do you guys
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:the justice of sharing something about me so that you can reflect about your life. What are some
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:cycles that you can really go back to? Whether it's the same thing for you, is it food? How was your
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:relationship with food in your household? Was it strict? Was it pretty lax? Like me personally,
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:when my mom would go on a diet, the whole house would have to go on a diet and I freaking hate diets
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:to the state because of that. Because it took away my freedom of choice of what I wanted to put into
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:my body as a kid. And so I don't have that same outlook on diets. I don't like the word
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:diet. I prefer a lifestyle choice, but that is up to you. And then another question is, what are
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:some patterns that you see playing out with your parents? That you realize like there's an imbalance
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:there. I feel like maybe you have that same theme of obligation to your family, but you don't
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:feel that support being sent back to you. And can you see that same thing between whether it's your
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:father, your mother? Was that same thing unfolding with their parents? And is it running through you too?
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:Because there are cycles that were unfolding before you even were thought of or birthed onto this
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:planet. And those cycles can sometimes come to your awareness because it's your turn to break them.
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:Because last generation felt that there was something there, but didn't feel uncomfortable
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:enough to do something different. Your generation is here to fill that uncomfortableness
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:in your body, in your soul, in your mind, in your emotions, and really change it up. So how has that
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:impacted you? And I wanted to do the justice of speaking about cycles in a way that is true to me
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:that has been felt, but I wanted to at least get you guys to really think and reflect
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:what are cycles that are still running in my life? And then you also want to think about what are the
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:cycles I have broken? You know, there's a sense of balance that's needed here because you could look at
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:all the things you haven't done, but I don't want you to get stuck in what I haven't done. I also want
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:you to reflect and honor yourself in a way where what are the things that you stopped? Whether it be a cycle
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:of addiction, whether it be a cycle of self-worth, did you notice that there was like a low self-esteem
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:in your family and that you switched that off by being more of yourself? By being loud, by being
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:present and not shutting yourself off to your emotions? Was there a cycle of no emotional intelligence?
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:Did you go against the green in your family? Did you go against the green with your friendships?
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:Are you pulling apart from old patterns? Sometimes you can outgrow cycles because you realize
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:you have those choice points to not continue it on and through the process of time you learn so much
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:and even if you don't get it right the first time it's okay, the cycles repeat so that you gain a
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:different level of awareness and maybe through that process of awareness and as the cycles are
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:unfolding you're being gifted with the courage to speak up. Maybe you didn't have the words or the
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:emotions cleared up enough to speak up and know who you are or maybe you didn't have the mental
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:awareness to be able to decide for yourself that this is something I do want to continue or not.
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:Maybe you just didn't have the support outside of you or within yourself, whatever it may be,
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:but the cycles that kept repeating kept showing you something and allowed you to grow and strengthen
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:in those areas that you needed to be able to go forward in the manner that you needed to.
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:Don't discredit your struggle. Sometimes through struggle we learn the hardest lessons
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:but we gain the most freedom within ourselves, whether that be an emotional, mental, physical
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:or spiritual aspect. You gain this freedom that you can't buy and that nobody can teach because
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:you had to experience it in the manner that you needed to in order to be yourself. So at the
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:same time I want you to give yourself a round of applause and if you're not going to do it I'm doing
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:it for you. Give me a second. You did the damn thing and keep going forward. It's not easy but
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:it's worth it. It's worth it because then you set yourself free from the past in a way that
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:builds your future in your present day as well. To be something that sits in the heart in a way
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:that's freedom, it feels refreshing, it feels like a breath of fresh air, it feels like a weight
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:lifted off your shoulders, off your chest, off your back, off your legs, off your hips.
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:You feel lighter in the sense that you're more of you and you've been carrying the stuff that isn't
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:you for such a long time that you built yourself the strength enough to get that weight off of you
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:that had pulled you down for so long that no longer needs to sit on you. You built that awareness,
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:you built that emotional intelligence, you built that physical strength and verbal strength to
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:speak be and embody your truth and that speaks immensely of who you are. So trust when things come
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:up, they're for you and not against you and I'm getting a little tearied because right now I'm in
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:this transition in different ways where I'm starting to realize like don't be afraid of what's
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:unknown instead connect with what is known and amplify it in a way that supports you and when I say
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:you I also include myself because I can get lost in the sauce as my husband says but it's really when
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:you take the moment to be present and know that I've done this shit before I can fucking do it again.
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:So let's go let's fucking do this thing. We're gonna make something magical happen.
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:Well that's it for this week's podcast episode. Please let me know what thoughts came through your
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:mind or what experiences that you've had in your life if you're again on a platform that you could
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:share this information. I also share snippets of this podcast episode as reals on Instagram and YouTube.
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:So if you're on those platforms and you haven't already followed me, write me there. I'd love to
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:hear what's going on with you guys how this episode hit your field of awareness and what are some
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:cycles you're currently going on and if there's anything that you'd want me to talk about or share
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:by all means I'd love to hear back from you. Bye for now.
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:Thank you for tuning in today. To stay up to date on all my happenings and offerings I invite you
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:to follow me on my YouTube channel and Instagram which is at Spark at the Hearts with the Z at the end.
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:If you like to work with me one-on-one please see the links to my booking page and website on the
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:show notes of this episode. Thank you again for tuning in and I look forward to our next gathering. Bye for now.
